Enough of living the dream vicariously

I recently watched “The Women” with Meg Ryan and a host of other great actors. I wasn’t sure what to expect - another Hollywood ‘flick’ about women banding together with no real meaning but to give witness to our endless emotions, hormones and some entertaining hen sessions? It turned out to be a pleasant surprise and I walked away with a few interesting things to think about and not necessarily in regards to the relationships women have with each other - but more importantly, the one we have with ourselves which Denise Marek addressed in our launch issue. 

Meg Ryan describes a recent decision to launch a clothing collection after a disasterous end to her marriage by stating  ‘after hitting bottom, you’ve got nothing left to lose. I highly recommend it.” I’m not suggesting hitting bottom is a great idea but I was inspired by the wisdom of taking a risk and allowing ourselves exposure to failure. Our own failure I mean - not someone else’s. Failure is one of the best ways to learn. For me, I had always thought of the things i wanted to do as ‘unattainable’ and too risky. Not that I’m normally risk adverse but when it comes to the big dreams - they have always been just that - ‘dreams’. So when I see someone else take a passion and turn it into a success, I am full of admiration and awe. They’ve taken those risks and I watch as they continue to grow upwards from that. I watch others go through the process instead of me - and they are the ones who reap the rewards -not me. 

I’ve recently taken the leap and it’s still a challenge and a continuous learning curve - but it’s a curve upwards -not a spiral downwards as I had dreaded. And when they say ‘fear is worse than the event itself,’ nothing seems truer. But we’ll never know until we take the plunge. 

Naturally this all takes strength, smarts and a lot of research but it also takes a very strong support network of people who will cheer you on, give you advice, offer help and be there to celebrate with you in the end or help you pick up the pieces and try all over again if ‘at first you don’t succeed’. Sounds easier than it actually is.  As time goes on though, I find myself surrounded more and more not just by my great friends but by like minded individuals who can offer their war stories, empathy, support as well as recognize both the hurdles and the achievements. 

The movie inspired me somewhat - it was an honest look at ourselves and our relationships but most importantly - it really demonstrated the strength within. Something we ignore or forget a little too often. Thankfully we have friends to help remind us.